Friday, December 18, 2009

A Daughter of the King.

Recently I finished School of Prayer and I left having an assurance that I could talk to God and He could in return hear me and speak to me. I also experienced another phenomenal revelation. That I have loved. I have friends and a family that adore me and that is something some people never really have. But amidst all this sometimes I stand afraid. I stand in care of what those I consider friends and family think of me. Whether I even match up to whom they think I am…

Do they really know me? Do I know myself? Would I ever stand fearless and care less of whatever anyone thinks?

Further investigations revealed a tat bit of insecurity that lingers on. The genesis of it is still unknown. Sometimes I rationalize and attribute it to a part of my personality; being a melancholic. Sometimes it to being a thorn in my flesh; something to constantly remind me of my human nature. Sometimes it’ll be an image that is tainted by the difficulties of life which have been thrust towards me and my own failures.

The annoying thing about feeling like so, is the paralysing fear that hinders me from rising and taking a stride towards what I believe to be truth. What I believe to be my destiny.

So I think back to a time when I trusted God with my life and ask myself did I trust Him with my whole entity? Didn’t He choose to die for my sins and to show grace and mercy so that I may be free? A redeemed child, a daughter of the Almighty King?

As I enjoy my 27th Year, I hope to do away with that fear & insecurity. To stand tall and understand there are people who won’t approve of everything I do and others who will cheer me on. Nevertheless, I’ll walk in faith and call on God’s courage to complete what he has ordained for me!

My life is in my Father’s hands so I shall rise up and take my rightful place as a child of God and Daughter of the King.

2Tim 1:7-8 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me his prisoner: but be thou partaker of the afflictions of the gospel according to the power of God;

Sunday, December 13, 2009

36 hours in a 24 hour day.

I am surrounded by a crowd of great women. Women who juggle aspects of their lives like professional jugglers in the circus and none of them drop. Be it school, work or their relationships. I stand in awe of them. I am one of those people who wish they had more time. More time to work. More time to visit my friends. More time to pray. More time to dance. This is because when I give attention to one thing the other one suffers, till I got reminded of the Fruit of the Holy Spirit. I realised I suffer for lack of Self-control. Most people look at self control as the act of denying oneself entirely as opposed to the act of controlling oneself. For example today I have taken my fair share of sugary stuff. I may have felt low on energy naturally I took some Fanta (not essentially the best of sugars to take). But I didn’t stop there; I indulged in café mocha and a chocolate fudge cake. I should have had enough but right now I feel inclined to take more sweet stuff like juice. Before you know it I am exuding gluttony (one of the deadly sins go figure) and not caring pretty much about my health by stuffing myself with sugar that will translate to fat and come January I am screaming work out and diet regimes. As I promise to take stock, I take a look at why I haven’t succeeded in much and it is because the fruit of the Spirit wasn’t born or expressed in me as it should have been. Self control alone doesn’t stand strong since the Fruit is a whole and it comprises of 9 parts. According to George W. Brown, all revolving around the ultimate part Love:

  1. Love – The supreme virtue
  2. Joy-The felicity of love
  3. Peace- The serenity of love
  4. Patience – The equanimity of love
  5. Kindness – The magnanimity of love
  6. Goodness – The generosity of love
  7. Faithfulness – The integrity of love
  8. Gentleness – The gentility of love
  9. Self Control - The discipline of love.

Don’t you think life would be perfect if we had the right dosage of this great Fruit? I know mine would be... So in a revealing way I have found how I can have 36 hours in a 24 hour day, to the glory of Him who made me and desired that I should have a fruitful and full life (life abundantly).
Gal 5:22-26 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

Life through Samara's eyes.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Taking Stock: Intro

The mood in the air is screaming holidays.
Scenario 1: If your workplace is like mine you already have all top bosses applying for leave and you can already feel the sluggishness and laxity towards work.
Scenario 2: In another part of the town a church is doing a series “Where you @?” Taking stock of what you have done the whole year and at what position you are at with what you began, what you finished, what you didn’t finish and what you didn’t get around to doing at all.
Scenario 3: Time for Thanksgiving and you have all your family members wishing you a happy one and you know very soon you are counting the 12 days of Christmas. Not entirely Kenyan. Us Kenyans we just wait for 23rd Dec when we close down till 2nd Jan and enjoy eating chapatis, roasting nyamchom and indulging with our family and friends.
Safe to say, another year has come and is ending. So in attempt to finish well and “learn” from my mistakes as well as pat my back before the festivities I’ve decided to take stock (a concept known as chunking in psychology) of the 6 areas in my life:
  1. Business and Finance
  2. Health and Fitness
  3. Career and Education
  4. Spiritual
  5. Family and Relationships
  6. Fun and Entertainment
This looks like it’s going to be fun. Let’s get chunking

Life through Samara's eyes.

Pilot: Samara

Samara is a female Hebrew meaning:
  1. "Mountain, Outlook, ruled by God, guarded by God; seedling"
  2. "Guardian or protected by God; night talk"
Not quite sure about the night talk but I do like the 1st part “protected/guided/ruled by God.”

This blog site was kind of inspired by the movie “Julie & Julia” One of those movies based on true story of 2 ladies in different times and how one is inspired by the cookery lessons and lifestyle of the earlier /older one; Julia Child. However this was not what struck me. What struck me was the need of the younger lady Julie Powell to find something she can do and complete. A project! She chose to go through Julia’s cookbook and do all the 536 recipes in 1 year’s time all this while blogging her process.
http://blogs.salon.com/0001399/2002/08/25.html

Then it made me think about life and how many of us want to finish something faithfully that they have started. I also missed blogging so I decided to start one and just have fun through it and through the challenges I’ll face and musings of my life’s Journey, guided/protected/ruled by God.

Theme verse:
John 15:4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me.
John 15:5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.

Life through Samara’s eyes!